


Monster

by WingedAria



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Childhood, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:06:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23398195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WingedAria/pseuds/WingedAria
Summary: Before he was Kylo Ren, he had another life. Meet the boy the Supreme Leader could never quite get rid of.Note: I have read and enjoyed the Charles Soule comics, but this story will go a different way.
Kudos: 5





	1. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five year old Ben Solo with his family on Chandrila. He learns a bit about the Force, meets an unexpected relative, and has his future set out before him.

Ben settled into bed, the lights dimming automatically as his mother left the room. He could see the shadows on the wall when his dad pulled his mom close, and could hear their murmured conversation. Warm and safe, he closed his eyes. 

_They are lying to you_ , a deep voice said softly, in his mind. His eyes snapped back open, and he sat up. The Force felt hazy around him, chilly and distorted by something he couldn’t see. 

He reached out to his mom through the Force, reassured to find her relaxed and happy. 

“Go to sleep, Ben,” she called to him aloud, and he lay back down. But when he closed his eyes, he saw a frightening black mask. Its round eyes reflected a red glow, and breaths rasped heavily through the barred mouthpiece. 

_Ask them again about your grandfather,_ the voice demanded, and then it was gone. Ben pulled the covers up over his head and clenched his eyes shut. He waited in the dark for the voice to come back, or for the cold haze to return to the Force around him, and eventually fell asleep. 

“My father was a Jedi, like Uncle Luke,” his mom said lightly, when he asked her at breakfast the next morning. “You know that.” 

And he did know that. But now, thanks to the voice’s prompting, he listened more closely. 

“There aren’t any other Jedi though,” he argued. Leia looked up, puzzled, from the message she had been reading. 

“I was trained as a Jedi, as well as Luke. And you could be someday too, if that’s what you want.” 

Ben kicked his heels against the legs of the bench, frustrated. He didn’t know how to find out what the voice meant. His family was the most famous in the galaxy. Which probably meant he was the only one anywhere who didn’t know whatever this hidden truth was. 

“Stop that,” Leia said sharply. And then, more gently, “what’s going on with you today?”

“You’re lying to me!” He stood up, arms crossed. The Force around Leia flickered with her emotions: annoyance, reluctance, fear. “Tell me,” he demanded, waving one small hand and pressing on his mother’s mind with the Force. 

Leia raised an eyebrow, torn between amusement and anger. “Stop that right now. Did your uncle teach you that?”

Ben stood stubbornly for a long moment, glaring at his mother. Willing her to answer.

“That’s enough from you, young man. Go to your room.” She returned her attention to the tablet in front of her, dismissing him, and he stormed out with all the indignation a five-year-old could muster. Leia watched him go, and sent a message to Luke. 

Later that morning, his uncle arrived. The whine of the old fighter’s engines overhead lifted his spirits, and he had to intentionally sulk when his mom opened the door to rescind his punishment. Luke was waiting in the kitchen in his usual brown and white robes. With his fists on his hips, he frowned down at Ben. 

“Giving your mother a hard time today?”

Ben wouldn’t lie to his uncle, so he just glared back. Luke laughed and lifted him up. “Come on, let’s get out of here.” 

Outside, Artoo beeped a cheery hello. Ben patted the droid as he and Luke walked around the x-wing, out of the hangar and out onto the quiet street. A walkway meandered in either direction and the occasional speeder cruised by, leaving a trail of pebbles and fallen leaves. Ben kicked a stone along ahead of him, then passed it along the ground to his uncle. They kicked it companionably for a few paces, and then Luke lifted the stone off the ground with the Force. A small gesture with his fingers brought up several more, and sent them spinning in a lazy circle above his hand. Ben watched, reluctant to be cheered up. He swatted at the stones with his hand, and they fell back into the street. Luke crossed his arms into the long sleeves of his robe, but said nothing. The air around them started to swirl, raising dust and leaves in a narrow column. Ben clenched his fists, and the small stones flung themselves in every direction, pinging off a passing speeder. Luke waved a hand and the dust settled. He lifted Ben onto the waist-high wall along the walkway and sat beside him. 

“Tell me what’s wrong,” he said.

“Mom and Dad lie to me,” Ben said after a moment, looking down at his feet. Luke nodded, listening. “I want to know everything.”

Luke smiled. “No one knows everything.”

Ben glanced up at him, doubt in his dark eyes. “Not even you?”

“Not me, or your mom, or Han.”

“But you know things I don’t,” Ben protested. 

Luke nodded. “We’re older. Knowledge takes time, and wisdom even more.” 

Ben thought about that for a minute, pushing dead leaves off the wall and watching them spiral down. “Why are they lying about my grandfather?”

“They think you’re too young to know the truth about him,” Luke began. “He helped me to defeat the Emperor, but for a long time before that, he was lost to the dark side of the Force.”

“Mom said he was a Jedi,” Ben said. Luke nodded again, more slowly. His aura in the Force tightened with sadness and regret. 

“He was, and then he wasn’t. Sometimes people make choices out of fear that aren’t good ones. Can you understand that?” 

Ben wasn’t sure he could, but he nodded anyway. 

“What’s the dark side?”

“When you feel angry, or afraid, and use that energy through the Force,” Luke explained. “Fear, anger, and hate are the paths to the dark side.” 

Another speeder passed, and Ben looked down past his dangling feet. “So when I threw the rocks, was that the dark side?” 

Luke smiled and hopped down off the wall, reaching up to help Ben down. “No, but you shouldn’t throw rocks because you’re angry. Jedi keep their emotions from running away with them. You want to be a Jedi one day?”

“Of course!” Ben couldn’t imagine wanting to be anything else. Except maybe the best pilot in the galaxy, like his dad. He took his uncle’s hand and they started walking back. 

“What did he look like?”

Luke’s thoughts were elsewhere. “Who?”

“My grandfather.”

“Oh, a little like you and a little like me. Why?”

“I dreamed about a man in a mask.” Ben cupped his free hand over his mouth and breathed out hard, then hissed a breath in. “Like that.”

He felt Luke flinch, but his uncle’s face stayed calm. “Did you? We can talk about that another time. Your mom is waiting for us.”

“She hates waiting,” Ben whispered, and Luke laughed. 

After lunch, he hugged Luke good-bye, and the adults walked out together to the hangar. Ben watched them through the window. He couldn’t hear what they were saying, but felt the echoes in the Force. His mom was upset, which was upsetting his dad. Luke was calm and certain. 

Chewie chuffed behind Ben. 

“I’m not eavesdropping,” Ben protested. “I can’t hear anything from here.”

Leaning down, the Wookiee roared softly and pointed to the door. 

“Oh...” Ben said, and followed him outside. Passing a convenient group of bushes, the Wookiee paused, giving Ben time to hide. From there, he could hear the adults clearly. Chewie ambled towards them. 

“...he’s so young,” Leia argued.

“The Force is strong in him, Leia, you’ve felt it. He needs training.” 

Han ran his palm along his thigh, a nervous gesture from years of carrying a blaster there. “It’s not like he’d be going today, Leia.”

“Not today,” Luke agreed. “But soon. There are others: I can start a school like we’d planned. He won’t be alone.”

Leia pursed her lips, uncertain. “He’s my little boy. I’m not ready to let him go.”

“He asked me about the dark side.” Luke’s voice was firm. “He wants to know about Vader.” 

“I know. He asked me too.” Leia glanced back at the window where Ben was supposed to be. 

“Maybe it’s the right thing for him,” Han offered. “Luke will keep him safe, get him trained up. If he’s this strong already...” Han trailed off with a shrug. 

“Think about it. Talk to him. Promise me,” Luke said as Chewie grabbed him in a hug. Ben took the opportunity to dart back into the house. 

That night, in bed, Ben felt for the cold haze in the Force. It was there, whispering faintly, and grew stronger when he reached out to it. _What’s a Vader?_ He asked, and heard two harsh, mechanical breaths before the deep voice answered, _I am_ . The image of the mask returned, and the hum of a lightsaber. _Darth Vader, lord of the Sith. I am your grandfather._ Ben was scared, but remembered what Luke had said. He was going to be a Jedi, so he shouldn’t be afraid. Fear was the path to the dark side.

 _Tell me more,_ Ben demanded, and the voice obliged. 


	2. Five: Off-planet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben takes his first trip off-planet, and makes new friends.

Soon after that, Han left for the first time. He swooped Ben into the air, making him laugh.

“Take me with you,” Ben begged when Han set him down and turned for the door. His dad shook his head. 

“Not this time, kiddo.”

Chewie grumbled and hugged Ben, ruffling his hair with one giant hand. Then they were gone, the  _ Falcon _ ’s engine rumbling away. 

Leia was busy with her work for the New Republic, so Uncle Luke came and picked him up. He hired a ship to go off-planet; it was the first time Ben had been allowed to leave. The ship was larger than the pair really needed, but not as big as the  _ Falcon _ . The pilot met them at the ramp and hugged Luke, then knelt down to Ben’s height. 

“You must be Ben,” he said. His voice was rich and musical, and he offered a hand to shake like an adult. His dark eyes were full of mischief. Ben liked him at once, and shook his hand seriously. 

“I’m Lando Calrissian,” the pilot continued. “Been friends with your parents since long before they even thought of you.”

Luke’s voice was amused but carried a hint of warning. “He’s a bit young for your stories, Lando.”

The pilot looked back at Ben and shrugged. The gesture was dramatic, thanks to his half cape. “They’ll keep. Let’s go.”

Ben ran up the ramp into the ship, excited to be leaving. The ship was still warm inside from the heat of transiting the atmosphere. An astromech droid chirped from the engine room, but Ben turned toward the cockpit and the controls. 

“Whoa, whoa,” Lando called, putting a hand on Ben’s shoulder. “Not this time. You sit in the back for takeoff, then I’ll show you around.”

Reluctantly, he took a seat on the bench along one wall, by a viewport. Luke sat across from Ben, watching him. The engines whined, then roared to life. With a lurch, they were off. He looked outside, watching the ground fall away from the landing gear. After a moment, the ship turned and rose up above the spaceport, and all of the city was laid out beneath them. The Senate building where Leia worked was there, so their house was just...there. Ben pointed it out to Luke, but by the time his uncle looked, the ground had faded into a green blur. The ship quieted as they broke through the atmosphere, and then the stars lengthened into streaks beyond the viewport. 

Luke sat beside him. 

“I began training with my first master on a starship,” he said. “It was actually the  _ Falcon _ , and I was much older than you.”

“You had more than one master?” Ben asked. He had never met another Jedi. And the voice had made it sound like there was only one master and one student at a time. 

“I had two,” Luke answered, “Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Master Yoda. You were named for Obi-Wan: back on Tatooine, he went by Ben to hide from the Empire.” 

“What happened to him?” 

Luke smiled, but looked a little sad. “He’s gone, but sometimes I can hear him, through the Force.” 

“He talks to you?” Ben watched Luke’s face intently. “Do other people hear him?”

“No, just me. Sometimes I see him too, and Master Yoda. I ask them for advice, and sometimes they answer.”

Ben couldn’t think what Luke would need advice for; besides his mom, Luke was the wisest person he knew. 

“You said you’d had dreams about a man in a black mask,” Luke said. “Would you like to talk about that?”

Ben shook his head slowly. It felt private, but Vader had never actually told him not to tell anyone. 

“Who is he?” Ben asked after a few moments. 

“He was a lord of the Sith. Have you heard of them before?”

In his mind, a flash of a diamond-shaped emblem and the red hum of a lightsaber. He shook his head again.

“The Sith use the Force, like Jedi, but they rely on the dark side. Do you remember what I told you about the paths to the dark side?”

“Anger, fear, and hate,” Ben recited quickly. Luke nodded, unsmiling. 

“Jedi have to be careful of our emotions, to put purpose above feelings. The light side is used to help others, not ourselves.” 

Ben nodded, to show he was listening. 

“The man in the mask was known as Darth Vader. He was the Emperor’s right hand man, the second most powerful creature in the whole galaxy.” Luke looked Ben in the eyes. “He was my father, and had been a powerful Jedi, before the dark side took control of him.”

“Wait, if he’s your father, he’s Mom’s too,“ Ben said, working it over. “Is that why he talks to me?”

Luke’s gaze sharpened. “He talks to you? I thought you said they were dreams.”

At that moment, the ship shuddered and the stars became points of light again outside the viewport. 

“Welcome to Glee Anselm,” Lando called back. A small blue planet hung beneath the ship, getting bigger by the second.

“Why are we here?” Ben asked, staring out the viewport in fascination. The blue resolved into a seemingly endless ocean, swirled with long streaks and whorls of cloud and storms. 

“I’m meeting the family of another prospective student,” Luke answered, looking preoccupied. “Sit down, it’s going to get bumpy.”

Ben strapped into the seat, watching as a single small continent appeared and grew more detailed outside. 

The air smelled different than at home, heavy with decaying vegetation and the unpleasant sour tang of the bay. Ben sat with his toes on the very end of the ramp, arms wrapped around his knees. Just off the landing pad was a ship repair shop and a small cantina, where Lando had disappeared ages ago. Uncle Luke had told Ben not to leave the ship, but he hadn’t expected to be left all alone. When they landed, Luke had pulled a rebreather from some hidden pocket in his robe, stripped off his heavy cloak and boots, and vanished under the calm surface of the bay. This new student Luke was meeting was a nautolan. Ben looked them up on the ship’s computer: green-skinned amphibian people with huge eyes and a head full of tentacles. He wondered what it felt like to breathe underwater. He held his breath and counted, looking up at the light reflected on the ceiling and imagining he was in the bay too. Twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty. He gulped in a breath. Uncle Luke had been underwater much longer than that. The surrounding jungle was hot in the afternoon sunlight. Ben scooted backwards up the ramp, into the shade. 

Inside the ship wasn’t any cooler, so he lay down on Luke’s cloak on the floor. The astromech rattled around, chirping to itself. A breeze trickled in, bringing music and chatter from the cantina. He wasn’t allowed in there either. He was just in the way. They should’ve left him at home. At least there he had friends. This wasn’t turning out to be the adventure he had hoped for.

A reptile as long as his forearm scurried under the ramp. Ben reached out for it with the Force, lifting it into the air. It hissed, turning to bite at the air holding it up. Its scales glimmered dull bronze in the sunlight. 

“That’s quite a talent,” a stranger’s voice said, just outside the ship. Without dropping the lizard, Ben peeked around the ramp strut. An extremely tall man stood next to a small shuttle, dressed in a belted robe. He smiled, although the effect was lessened by his scarred, hollow face. He gestured to the lizard, which was trying to run away, flailing three feet above the ground. 

“I haven’t seen anyone do that in years,” the man continued. “How old are you?”

Ben frowned. His mother always said not to trust a compliment. But it felt good to be noticed. “Almost six.”

The man nodded and bent down to look up the ramp at Ben. “Quite a talent,” he said again, thoughtfully. 

Ben stood, letting the lizard go gently into the underbrush nearby. The man watched it go, then looked around the landing pad. 

“Did you fly this ship in too?” The man asked Ben, with a hint of teasing in his voice. 

Ben smiled back. “No, my uncle and his friend flew it. I’ll learn when I’m older.”

“Where’s your uncle now? He must think a lot of you, to leave you to take care of the ship alone.” The man leaned against the strut, eyes level with Ben’s where he stood on the ship’s deck. 

“I guess,” Ben said, shuffling his feet. He couldn’t feel anything in the Force around the man, just a vague chill. 

The door to the cantina jingled open, the burst of cool air sending leaves flying. Lando came out, tucking sabacc cards into a pocket in his cape. The tall man straightened as Lando came closer. 

“And who are you?” Lando asked, voice just shy of friendly. He stopped at the edge of the ramp, looking between Ben and the stranger.

“Just passing the time with your nephew here,” the tall man replied. 

“Uh-huh,” Lando said suspiciously. 

“He’s not my uncle,” Ben began, but Lando waved him off.

“Pass the time inside, like everyone else.” 

The tall man’s lips thinned, but he moved back towards his own shuttle. Once Lando’s eyes were off him, he waved farewell at Ben. 

Ben let Lando lead him back up the ramp into the ship. The pilot was lecturing him about talking to strangers, and not telling Luke he’d been left alone, but Ben wasn’t listening. When they got to the cockpit, Lando lifted him into the co-pilot’s seat. Ben understood it was a bribe, but was too delighted to be allowed in the cockpit to mind. By the time Luke got back, dripping wet but looking pleased, Ben had pushed the conversation with the stranger to the back of his mind, which was full of the buttons and switches of the little ship’s control panel. 

Luke ruffled Ben’s hair, trailing drops of water from his sodden sleeve. “How’s the little pilot doing?” He asked Lando, who was priming the engines. 

“Coming along nicely,” Lando grinned. “Soon he’ll be better than you.” 

“Well, what did you expect?” Luke asked rhetorically.

Lando pointed to a button, and Ben pushed it. The ramp slid up and into the wall, sealing with a hiss. The engines growled. With Lando’s hand guiding his, Ben pushed the throttles forward. The ship rose slowly into the air. As it turned, he could see the tall man standing by his shuttle, watching them go. 

_ So long, Ben. Keep working on those special talents of yours _ .

Ben blinked. The man had spoken to him, in his mind. He hadn’t known that anyone but Jedi could do that. But that man couldn’t be a Jedi: Uncle Luke was the only one. He turned to Luke, but his uncle clearly hadn’t heard anything. He was tapping at a datapad, looking pleased and relaxed. Anxious, Ben tightened his grip on the controls, watching the stars brighten as the atmosphere faded away. Lando entered a route into the navicomputer. 

“Ready for the jump?” The pilot asked. Ben nodded, and Lando put Ben’s hand on the hyperspace throttles. They slid back smoothly and the ship leapt forward. The stars melted into streaks and Ben imagined the speed blowing the voices right out of his mind. No one else heard them, so maybe if he pretended he didn’t either, they would go away. 

_ Don’t be afraid _ , Vader’s voice said into the silence of hyperspace. Ben jerked back into his seat. 

“You ok?” Lando asked, reaching across the little cockpit to rest a hand on his shoulder. Ben nodded again, fighting against a lump in his throat. He felt like crying. 

“Long day for you,” Lando said. “Why don’t you go rest in the back? It’ll be awhile before our next stop.”

Ben climbed carefully out of the cockpit and sat beside Luke. His uncle shifted to put his arm around his shoulders. Luke’s brown robe was thick and soft, so although Ben could smell the lingering damp sourness of the bay, he snuggled close. The datapad showed a picture of a young nautolan girl, barely a toddler. Her tiny head tentacles stood out around her head, and she smiled up with sharp white teeth. 

“She’ll be a padawan, like you,” Luke said, smiling down at Ben. “One day, the temple will be full of students, learning the ways of the Force.”

Ben felt the lump in his throat again and ducked his head against his uncle’s side. Luke pulled him close. 

“Want to tell me what’s wrong?” 

“Yes,” Ben said, muffled by his uncle’s robes. 

Luke waited. After a few minutes, he felt the boy relax and slide down along the bench, fast asleep. 


	3. Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten year old Ben prepares to leave home.

Five years later, Ben awoke late in the night to the sound of an argument down the hall. His parents were fighting again. The waves of anger and disappointment radiating from them were physical, to him. Anxiety tightened his skin and sent fear along his shoulders and spine. They were fighting about him. He knew it, although he couldn’t hear what was being said. 

The things Ben could do frightened his father. Han pretended to be proud of him, but the fear was there, flickering in his eyes. For Han, the Force wasn’t a constant part of life, just occasional nudges he chalked up to good luck or instinct. Ben couldn’t even remember not feeling the Force; it was as obvious and necessary as air to breathe. 

He sat up, listening, knowing and dreading what would come next. His mother said something indiscernible but cutting; he could feel his father’s anger and hurt pride boil up. Heavy footsteps, and the outside door slammed down. His father would come back, days or weeks later, with unlikely stories and the metallic, stale smell of the recycled air on the  _ Millennium Falcon. _ His mother would immerse herself in work, which was little different from the usual except for the annoyance and worry in the lines around her mouth. Neither of them would acknowledge the separation, once they were back together. They’d act as though it had never happened, until the next fight. Then Leia would call his father faithless and mercenary, and Han would call her self-righteous and cold. And in his room, alone, Ben listened. 

_ I am here with you, _ Vader’s deep voice reminded him. By now, the rasping breath was familiar, and he didn’t mind the cold that threaded through the Force. 

With Han and Chewie gone, the house was quiet when Ben awoke the next morning. Down the hall he could hear Leia on the communicator, working already. The sun streamed in through the window, and he pulled the pillow over his head. Someone tapped at the door, but he didn’t answer. After the fight, he hadn’t gotten much sleep. Maybe his mom would be distracted enough to let him stay home. Threepio‘s anxious voice carried through both the door and the pillow. 

“Master Ben, Mistress Leia sent me to make sure you are ready to go,” the droid called, tapping again on the door. 

“Go away,” Ben called back. 

“Very well,” Threepio said, managing in his way to sound snippy and polite at the same time. Ben threw the pillow at the door, but got up and dressed in the school uniform just the same. 

The school in Hanna City was close to their house, so Ben often walked there. The streets were safe, tree-lined, and patrolled by the city’s droid police force. All along the way were the homes of other New Republic legislators and ambassadors, and their children. This morning, like most, Ben met up with the pair of Twi’lek children next door. Hahnee waved at him from her doorway, helping her little brother Charth put his coat on. Ben waved back, and waited for them on the walkway. A colorful bird perched on a branch overhead, watching him. 

_ Come here, _ Ben thought at the bird, holding out a hand for it to perch on. It tipped its head sideways, regarding him with one eye at a time. It would have been easy enough to move the little creature, but Snoke had been teaching him to be more subtle. The bird should come to him on its own.  _ Come down, now,  _ he thought again, and pulled at the bird’s small mind with the Force. The bird squawked and ruffled its feathers. 

“Stop bothering the poor creature!” Hahnee shoved Ben gently. The Twi’lek girl took some seeds from the pocket of her coat and scattered them along the wall. “They’ll come down if you feed them, see?”

As they walked by, the bird hopped onto the wall, pecking happily. Charth ran ahead, purple lekku bouncing on his shoulders. 

“I saw the  _ Falcon _ leaving last night,” Hahnee said, tipping her head back to see the sky through the branches overhead. “Maybe when he comes back, your dad will take us flying.”

“He doesn’t let anyone fly it besides him,” Ben answered. “It’s such a piece of junk anyway.”

Hahnee shrugged. “I’ll be a pilot one day, and have my own ship. Then we can go wherever we want.”

“I’m leaving here soon,” Ben said. “My uncle is taking me to a new school.”

“Can I come?”

“I don’t think so.” Ben grabbed a stick from the ground and brandished it like a lightsaber. “It’s only for Jedi.”

Hahnee put her hands on her hips. “I could be a Jedi.”

“No, you can’t,” Ben said with certainty. She had no more conscious access to the Force than the bird had. 

“I can if you can. You’re not so special, Ben Solo.”

“Oh no?” He tossed the stick at her and stopped it in midair with a wave of his hand. “You can’t do that, can you?”

Hahnee grabbed the stick with both hands and poked him with it. 

“Don’t need to. I won without it.” She stuck her tongue out at him and ran ahead, into the school with her brother. 

The bells outside the Senate dome chimed the hour. He was officially late. The teaching droid scanned the yard and closed the door. Maybe he just wouldn’t go to school today, Ben decided. Then a Rodian boy ran up behind him. 

“We’re late, come on Ben,” the boy panted as he passed. Ben shrugged and followed him inside. 

After school, he was surprised to find Uncle Luke and his mom waiting outside the gate. Busy with their own lives, they usually let him walk back with his friends. The noisy crowd of children slowed and quieted as they passed, glancing shyly at the Jedi and the princess. Ben ducked his head so his dark curls covered his face, and tried to pass by with all the other kids. 

“Ben!” Leia called out. “Walk with us.” 

It wasn’t a suggestion. Hahnee turned around with him, and looked up at Luke. 

“Does Ben have to go?”

Luke bent to one knee to look Hahnee in the eye. She stared back at him, fearless. 

“He does,” Luke answered. “It’s time for him to learn to be a Jedi.”

“We’re not going to be Jedi, we’re going to be pilots,” Hahnee declared. Luke chuckled. 

“He can be both, you know. I’m a pilot myself.”

Hahnee thought that over for a moment. Leia brushed Ben’s hair out of his eyes, and he shook it back down. Charth walked backwards along the walkway, calling back to his sister. 

“Run along,” Luke told the girl. She looked to Ben, uncertain. He crossed his arms, not meeting her eyes.

“Well, bye then,” Hahnee said, and gave a little bow before she trotted after her brother.

Neither of the adults seemed to want to break the silence as they walked back toward the house. The trees rustled overhead, and the colorful birds cackled. Ben walked quickly, ready to go. He had always hated good-byes, and this one felt permanent. Best to get it over with quickly. 

_ You’ve outgrown this place, _ the voice assured him. More frequently now, the voice in his mind belonged to the stranger who called himself Snoke.  _ It’s time.  _

“Are we leaving today?” Ben asked, not looking back at the adults. 

“Tomorrow morning,” Leia answered. 

“Will Dad be back?” 

Luke and Leia glanced at each other. 

“No,” Leia said gently. “But he’ll come visit you soon.”

_ You don’t believe that,  _ the voice challenged.  _ They’ll be relieved when you’re gone.  _ Ben stopped walking. The concrete wall beside him cracked as his power flared. 

Luke laid a hand on Ben’s shoulder. “At the old temple, before the Empire, younglings started their training as soon as they could walk.”

“That would’ve been better,” Ben muttered. Luke sighed and glanced back at Leia. 

“This is a great opportunity for you, Ben. The start of a new adventure,” Leia encouraged him. 

“I know. I do want to go,” Ben said, turning to face his mom. “I just wish Dad was here, to say goodbye.”

“It’s not really goodbye,” Luke assured him. 

“It’s not so far, only a few systems away. And next time we see you, you’ll be a padawan.” Leia smiled and hugged him. He shrugged her off, looking around to make sure none of his friends saw. He could feel his mother’s hurt, and was spitefully glad.


End file.
